Dinosaurs suck // 2016

When you hear an ad on the radio boasting the "Worlds most epic dinosaur event!!" "You won't believe your eyes" "Interactive and a once in a lifetime event" "Fully interactive" "Ride through the marsh on a TRex and the pterodactyls fly above you" Well, you load up the kids (+a cousin) and head that direction. Honestly, we were a little reluctant but thought surely it will be fun.

This wasn't on purpose but completely picture worthy.

So these were the first ones we saw, still thinking it was going to be cool

I had to take a picture of this epic mullet. I mean, why not.

So when we go in the door the organization of this thing is lacking, #1 understatement of the century. It was crazy expensive, but remember, we are thinking we are getting a "world famous" experience. So we suck it up and move along. First few dinos are kinda cool.

Then some started getting cheesy. Again, the kids thought it was cool so we continued.

I mean look at that backdrop, I mean those precious smiles. Yeah, the smiles.

He wanted to look like he was holding it.. I cringe looking at this picture with my marketing background. We did events for years, can't you splurge on some pipe and drape??!? Again, kids having fun. Moving on.

You gotta take a selfie, right?

or two. This one actually makes me giggle.

Now note: all of the above was in a building...a VERY HOT building with dirt floors. I cannot tell you how dirty/dusty we were when we left there. So we paid the extra for the arm bands because "world famous blah blah blah" and we migrated to the outside tents. Oh holy hell. It was a mess! The simple hazards were enough to make me want to pack up my crew but I knew that wasn't happening because the hubs paid "half a college tuition" 😂😂 to get into this place. Not really but your would have thought it by his reaction. Anyway, there were extension cords everywhere, standing water, trip hazards galore and the "roadies" were less than kind (OH MY!)

Again, kids having fun.. yeah blah blah blah. I mean seriously, look at that dude in the back. What?!?!

They really were having fun at this point. They didn't notice the things we did.

So they have the ginormous blow up inside a tent. I assume it is because it would have been hotter outside but the sauna sweat inside my shirt would beg to differ. Ugh.

The always competitive twosome found this one to be fun.

And the little guy joined too. Now everyone had to take off their shoes to get on these things, remember the standing water comment = gross. I had to literally carry kids to and from their shoes - because they had to be in a specific spot, which wasn't easy for the kids to get to. Again, ugh.

This was the most ridiculous thing. They boasted this as a "HUGE" dinosaur dig. Huge? I mean, it was like four 6'x4' boxes with very little sand. I think at this point the kids were trying to humor us.

Yes, I made them do this. I thought it would be a cute picture. #inserteyeroll

And clearly Chaz is thrilled. Thanks for playing along, Jackson.

It.was.hot.

They did get to climb into this big ol' head but again, not at all what was advertised.

By this point we were certainly all ready to go. We had already witnessed them completely shut down one of the BIG bounce houses, actually the cool obstacle course one. Why? Oh because the people had not received a break all day and literally quit on the spot. Excellent management from the event.

After that wonderfulness, complete with some excellent adult language, we traveled to the other inside events, mainly because we were about to pass out from the heat. This one was make your own fossil. Which was ok but there weren't enough workers or materials and you were suppose to let it "set" for an hour before taking it with you. Oh mercy lady, we will not be here in an hour. Guarantee.  I just carried around the wet cups and prayed they wouldn't spill in my car, which they did.

Again, with these sweet boys appeasing me.

The hubs went and stood in a line with the baby for 45+ minutes so he could ride a dinosaur... you can only imagine what a joke that was. The big boys and I tried to kill some time but gave up and headed to the car.

Seriously, never go to this event. N.E.V.E.R. It is dreadful. I am not the only one, promise. We take our kids a lot of places and do a lot of fun things but I can certainly think of better events to spend our money. The saddest thing was watching some families where you could tell they had built this up, this was their event to attend and it was a waste of money. So sad.

The kids had a decent time but it wasn't worth it. Not the money, not the heat, not the mess, not the rudeness, not the hype, none of it. Again, ugh.

I told you the really now here is the Insta worthy photo that makes it look like we had the time of our lives 😂   Don't worry, I was honest on the day of the event too. Not smoke and mirrors with this family!

I think he was about as done as I was. Peace out, dinos!  *note: were were waiting in the car so the hubs could go search for drinks. Yes, search. The concessions were just another problem. Again, ugh.